Legacy, have you thought about it?

Last month I was at an art opening and I was talking with a friend who was one of the artists in the show. A friend and artist who I respect both personally and professionally. We started to have a conversation about how busy life is and I mentioned that I was going to start scaling back on the amount of fine art work I produce. That I need a better balance in life. I never said I was going to quit, only slow down and spend more time with the family. I mentioned watching old movies recently from about 46-47 years ago when I was a toddler and we had a huge extended family BBQ in our backyard. We don't do that anymore. Our families have become so compartmentalized and we rarely meet in such grand fashion as my family once did a long time ago with grandma, aunts, uncles, and cousins.

This conversation lead to my friend, maybe out of concern about my statement of slowing way down with my art, saying “Bill, your photographs will be your legacy. You need to continue to produce work”. I replied that I always saw my legacy being my children and how they grew into adults. This simple but monumental word, “legacy” has really got my mind churning since that conversation.

I struggle with my work being my legacy. I understand it and my ego would sort of enjoy it but as I began to dissect this concept more deeply, my basic concept of my legacy hasn't changed but has broadened. In the true definition of the word, yes my personal possessions are my legacy but when I think of legacy I think of all the things that are not as easy to measure as an object of mass is. So what is or do I hope my legacy to be?

Positive memories of activities that resulted in beautiful connections, discoveries, and humanity. Not the grandiose adventures that require extensive resources but the small little gestures that warm ones heart, make someone know you care, extend a hand to someone in need. In need of a reminder of how beautiful they are, how much they matter, how much you enjoy being in their company.

I'm reminded of the walks I've taken with my wife, the way my heart swells when I see the love connection my wife has with the kids, the hours of conversations while teaching my three kids how to drive, The bike rides, the hugs when life throws you a curve, doing the dishes, the laundry, and just providing a listening ear. Walking on the beach with my grandson or when he cups his hands under my chin or gently presses them against my face and says “beard”. A moment in time that I hope builds within his own mind a legacy of Papa. All the intimate conversations with my mom, most recently our trip to Kenosha and our long scenic drive back to Milwaukee. What do these moments in time create? Lasting memories of loving moments of time commitments and relationships. For me, my dad's legacy isn't anything physical he left behind but the calm, quiet but strong presence he provided. You always knew that things would turn out OK. He had that effect on people.

Yes, my photographs can be a conduit to many great moments and maybe that is what was meant by her comment. My art has allowd me to be around many wonderful, original, and caring individuals who make up much of the art community. Lately the end result of my photography has been portraits but the portraits are just a disguise for great stories. Great stories of brave, beautiful, and caring individuals who took a little bit of time out of their very busy lives to share their awesomeness with me. Many of these people have become my friends. It's the connections that matter. Positive connections lifting people up and showing that in this mad world we live in, they matter. Their physical presence, their sharing of the most valuable resource – time, and their ability to communicate both verbally and physically in a very intimate way. That will be the legacy of so many awesome individuals who graced my studio and camera with their presence. I guess if the photographs I leave behind create a tangible connection to the humanity we are all capable of, then I hope that they do become a part of my legacy. In the end, I guess it's not up to us to decide. Our actions and those still around to remember those actions will create our lasting legacy. I'd love to hear what you hope your own legacy to be.

shutters/dead ends/lens/pens

Latest blog posts from shutters/dead ends/lens/pens, click HERE to be directed to the blog post.

Adore Noir magazine

Available Monday, August 4 for digital download "HERE".

No Strings Attached

New blog post for shutters/dead ends/lens/pens, the awesome literary and visual collaborative project with writer David Press. Check out the chapter 12 visual call by clicking on this link:

No Strings Attached



Awakening

copyright William Zuback 2014



shutters/dead ends/lens/pens

Here is the link to my response to David Press's chapter 11 call to shutters/dead ends/lens/pens.

The Pose

Chained

Facebook censored another photo!

Banned from Facebook, Nudity!

Magic is the Child

I wrote a poem many years ago for my son titled, “Magic is the Child”. I often reflect on life through the eyes of a child because it truly is the most pure and honest expression that exists. Children express themselves without a filter of what others think or how they will be judged. They create with a purity of freedom adults have a hard time opening their hearts and minds to. This time doesn't last long though. By the time my son was ready to start kindergarten he had to take a variety of tests. One of these was to draw “in the circle”. He drew in the circle but not in mass, meaning he scribbled inside the circle but didn't fill it with a solid color. This apparently was “wrong” and showed a lack of skill development, so they said. I was appalled by this judgment as well as other things they said. What happened to originality of expression?

Fast forward twenty five years and we are at my daughters college graduation. A family celebration dinner included my mother-in-law suffering from dementia. It was sad to witness that since our last visit she only now recognized her husband, no longer knowing her daughter, son-in-law, or grand kids. What was amazingly positive though was her child like view of our grandson, her great grandson. She fell in love with him even though she didn't know who he was. She kept saying, I want one of those and her expression was so pure and honest. It truly was a beautiful moment.

I've had moments with my personal artwork where I could have taken a path more popular, more relevant to what is reflected in contemporary photography today. Although difficult at times, I persevered and remain child like in the creation of my personal photography. Nothing is calculated and thought out beyond the experience of creation that is relevant to me and my way of expressing my thoughts and feelings in the form of a photograph. My wife who is always supportive reminds me when I get down, “What do you expect, you photograph people nude and creepy dolls. How many people want to hang that in their homes?” She is right but for me to do anything else would make me an imposter. I would loose that purity of freedom I enjoy in the creation of my work.

I've been reading The Art Spirit by Robert Henri and it is filled with so much great advice for the artist. Most pages are filled with wonderful quotes to share with fellow artists. I'll end this blog post with a small excerpt from the book which resonates with me and was the impetus for sharing my thoughts in this post.

The Art Spirit by Robert Henri

If one is a painter this purest freedom must exist

at the time of painting. This is as much as to say

that a painter may give up his hope of making his

living as a painter but must make it some other

way. This is generally true, although some do, by a

freak of appreciation, make enough while going

their way to live sufficiently well. Perhaps this hap-

pens, but I am not sure but that there is some cur-

tailing of the purity of the freedom.                       

I was once asked by a young artist whether he

could hope to make any money out of his work. If

he continued in his particular style of painting. He

happened to be a man of considerable talent and

had great enthusiasm in his work. But I knew there

was no public enthusiasm for such work. I remem-

bered he had told me that before he got really into

art he had made a living by designing labels for

cans, tomato cans and the like. I advised him to

make tomato-can labels and live well that he might

be free to paint as he liked. It happened also that

eventually people did buy his early pictures al-

though he was as far from pleasing by what he was

doing at this time as ever before. He now lived on

the sale of his old pictures and was as free to paint

his new ones as he had been in the days of tomato

cans.                                                                  

Magic is the child, born with open arms!

I meet the coolest and most interesting individuals

Sojourner is a wonderfully fascinating individual who has, and continues to lead, a beautifully rich life. Experiencing it with a passion for learning, observing and feeling.

We share the same interest in meeting new individuals and creating positive and creative collaborations. Our portrait session was nothing short of amazing. Among the many portraits we created, I also had the opportunity to add to my growing series which is, Untitled (The Dress).

It's an exploration of interaction and identity with this one dress and what it represents. Here is one of our collaborations from Sunday morning's photo session.

© William Zuback

Sojourner

Sundays portrait session, Sojourner. What a beautiful, strong, and free spirit she is.

© William Zuback

It is always the journey: an afternoon of fun, history and photography

My sitter on Saturday was a gentleman named Paul. Paul works at a couple different antique stores in the area and enjoys documenting and researching his family's lineage. He looks a lot like his great grandfather and was interested in creating some photographs that expressed his own interest in collecting, as well as, being an homage to his great grandfather. During the afternoon session I showed him an old accounting ledger that I have and after a quick look, determined it's from  Atlanta, GA., civil war era. He pointed out that with the dates of entry and the fact that Atlanta had burned to the ground two years later, he is surprised that this even survived. I guess I have some investigating ahead of me to see what I have in my possession.

 

Untitled (the dance)

© William Zuback 2014

Untitled (the dance)

This beautiful portrait is one of a small but growing series I'll be showing at the Racine Arts Council, part of "Time Share Exchange", a collaborative curatorial project by Frank Juarez and Maureen Fritchen. Opens May 2.

© William Zuback 2014

Somewhere over the Rainbow

Yesterday, my wife had to talk me off of the proverbial ledge. I was in one of those, "why do I continue to do this" moods with my photography. The great thing is that she knows me so well and since writing her first novel, she too experiences all of the questions and doubts that go into putting yourself out there in such a vulnerable way.

I've done a lot of soul searching this year as to "who am I" with the work I create? So far I have decided that I'm more photographer than artist, especially since I've gone back to portraits as my main area of emphasis. So then the next logical step is "who am I creating the work for"? Obviously, first and foremost, it's for my sitter and myself. A collaboration of creative participation that hopefully manifests into photographs that represent the beauty, confidence and imagination of our connected experience. I would be remiss in denying the desire to have the work resonate to a larger audience (whatever larger is defined as). The problem, for me, lies in this last observation.

When I first started to create this work that was different than my commercial work, it was done with child like eyes and behavior. There was no other expectation than the experience of creating a visual that was in my mind and needed to see the light of day. Once that action was completed it was time to move on to the next one. Then someone comes along and asks, "Have you ever shown these to anyone?" and the answer is no but they have a connection to someone who has a gallery and they help get your work seen. Soon you are showing this work that was hidden to the general public and it has a certain amount of resonance. You do more and show that as well but soon your mind becomes corrupted with expectations both self imposed and external and you begin to wonder what happened to that innocence that brought you true happiness when creating your very personal visual observations? Your happiness is compromised and the feeling of the creative process is changed.

This continues to be a year of regaining that child like innocence and naïveté with my work. Making sure that my intention and motivation is genuine and honest to my creative process and personal growth. Magic is the child, born with open arms!

Lia, an intimate portrait

Lia,  copyright William Zuback 2014

Midnight III

What are you working on?

As a creative, this is often one of the first questions asked when you attend an event in the area of your genre whether it be the visual arts, music or literature. It is a way of starting a dialog with your peers that allows for a conversation of similar interest in the arts. I guess it's no different than being asked, "How is work" or "How is the family"? We need to find a common thread that can connect us to a shared value or idea so that the conversation can begin. I open conversations with a line like this often yet when asked of me, I am regularly met with a certain amount of internal angst and confusion as to how I should answer such a question.

Especially of late, I just finished the Identity project which was a two year process from conception to exhibition. Since then I've been in a mode of exploration of both photography and motives. The Identity project changed how I view my relationships and my life experiences. I understand that all art is personal but what is the motivating factor for the creation of the art? Ideally it is always an honor for it to be seen, appreciated and discussed in societal circles but WHAT IF that factor has taken a real backseat to your ultimate goals and expectations? Being seen or heard is like the icing on the cake or the validation of a job well done. How many people do you need to feel that way? Is it the masses or can it be one or can it just be you? Who are you creating for?

For me the journey and the process have always been the most important part of the creation of my images but the accolades are always nice as well. I've been doing a lot of soul searching lately and ask myself often, If I was told that the work I create would never again be seen by the public, would I still create my art? The answer is a resounding, YES!

So, what are you working on and who are you creating your art for?

Sunday's Session

Rough edit from Sunday's session.

State of Being  ©William Zuback